Scenario Ten — By Anne Stonehouse AM and Oslo Davis.
How would it affect your self-concept if someone did everything for
you—someone who could do it more quickly, more efficiently, more competently?
Sometimes we like having things done for us, but not all the time. Building a
positive sense of self relies on having many experiences where the message is ‘You
are capable, you can do things for yourself’, along with learning that help is
available if needed.
Finishing sentences for children when they are talking, completing a
drawing for them, always carrying them instead of letting them move on their
own, feeding them when they want to feed themselves, picking them up and
putting them in chairs instead of giving them the time to do it are the kinds
of experiences that can interfere with children’s view of themselves as
competent and confident learners.
Knowing when to give help and when to encourage children to do things for themselves, without pressuring them, is one of the biggest challenges adults face in their relationships with children.